“And remember, auditions for Swan Lake are tomorrow!” Sydney’s ballet instructor, Elise, chirped. “Ballet class is dismissed!”
“Syd, who are you auditioning for?” Sydney’s best friend, Natalia, asked as they walked into the dressing room.
“Odette, the Queen of the Swans, of course,” Sydney laughed as she tucked a loose blond curl behind her ear.
“I heard Michelle is auditioning for Odette, too,” Leila, another friend of Sydney’s, said, catching up to them.
Sydney groaned. “Michelle! She’s the best dancer in this entire dance school! Why does she have to audition for the role I want?” She sat down and began taking off her pointe shoes.
Leila laughed sympathetically. “It is the main role in Swan Lake. Who wouldn’t want to be Odette?”
“Me!” Natalia spoke up. “I want to be Odile, the evil girl who tricks the handsome prince into thinking she’s Odette.”
“What about you, Leila?” Sydney asked.
Leila rolled her eyes. “Oh please. I’m not a fabulous dancer like all of you. I’ll just hope I’m a swan.”
Sydney stood up and put on her black coat. “I’ll see you guys tomorrow, OK? Rest up.” On her way out, she bumped into Michelle.
“Watch it,” Michelle snapped, flicking away a loose ebony wisp of hair.
“Sorry,” Sydney mumbled as she walked out the door.
* * *
As the sun peeked over the glittering Lake Michigan, spreading its rosy glow over the city, Sydney sat in her mom’s car, twiddling her fingers nervously. Sydney’s mom eyed her. “You’ll do fine,” Mom reassured her.
“I hope,” Sydney said weakly.
The remainder of the twenty-minute car ride was in silence. Michelle’s sure to get the part of Odette, Sydney thought miserably. That thought did not cheer her up whatsoever. She doesn’t deserve it. I deserve it. I’ve worked so hard for this part!
“Sydney?” Mom’s voice interrupted her thoughts. “We’re here.”
Sydney took a deep breath. “Bye,” she said.
* * *
Syd!” Natalia exclaimed as Sydney
walked into the dressing room. “Are ya ready for auditions?”
Sydney cracked a weak smile. “I’ve felt better.”
“Well, hurry up,” Leila said, tying the ends of her pointe-shoe ribbons. “Elise said we’re starting soon.” Sydney nodded, slipping a perfectly worn pointe shoe onto her foot.
A few minutes later, Sydney heard Elise’s delicate voice. “Group One audition: Abigail, Kelsey, Jessica, Leila, Molly. Group Two audition: Megan, Britney, Ashlee, Natalia, Selena. Group Three audition: Michelle, Britta, Samantha, Kylie, Sydney. OK, girls, let’s get started!”
Elise taught all three groups a combination from a scene in Swan Lake. It wasn’t hard, Sydney recalled later. It wasn’t easy either, seeing as her legs were still shaking with fear.
“Group One!” Elise called. Leila flashed Sydney and Natalia a smile as she started to dance to the light piano music.
“Group Two!” the ballet instructor shouted a few moments later, and Natalia walked to the center of the dance floor, along with the four other girls. As the delicate music began to play, Leila sat down next to Sydney.
“Did I do OK?” she asked. Sydney nodded, eyes closed, and Leila understood. “Don’t be nervous. Just pretend you’re in ballet class.”
Distantly, Sydney heard Elise’s voice call, “Group Three!”
Sydney took her place next to Michelle. “Break a leg,” Michelle smirked.
“Thanks.”
“No, really, break a leg.”
Sydney rolled her eyes.
Faintly, she heard the music start. Glissade, soutenu, développé, Sydney thought to herself, going through the steps in her head. She was soaring through the steps, dancing with her heart and soul, and enjoying every minute of it. Sydney was quietly aware of Michelle beside her, doing as well as, if not better than, herself. It didn’t matter. The only thing that mattered was ballet.
The dance ended and Sydney smiled radiantly at Elise, who she saw was scribbling notes on her clipboard. “Very good, everyone,” Elise said, beaming.
“You did so good, Sydney,” Natalia raved as they were walking into the dressing room.
“Thanks, Nat,” Sydney said, “but you’re not the one who chooses the parts.”
As Sydney left the studio, she decided that she’d done the best she could do and she could only hope for the best.
* * *
Syd!” Natalia squealed the next day
as Sydney entered the dressing room. “Hurry up! Elise’s going to announce the cast as soon as everyone’s here!” She grabbed Sydney’s hand and they raced onto the dance floor where all the dancers were crowded.
“Well, it looks like everyone’s here,” Elise said. “OK. So the person who will be Odile is… Natalia Windson!”
“Yes!” Natalia shrieked. “I did it!”
Elise smiled. “Now we have our party guests, present at the party in Act Four. They will be Samantha Grayson, Kylie Johnson, Leila Mason, Selena Lopez, Megan Elsen and Ashlee Rolf.”
Leila looked grimly at Natalia and Sydney.
“Next is our group of swans. They will be Kelsey Bishop, Jessica Bergmann, Abigail Michaels, and Sydney Miles.”
Sydney stood there, stunned. “No,” she whispered. Her head was spinning and her heart pounding. A swan? Me?
She faintly heard Elise saying, “Odette will be played by Michelle Thompson.” Sydney’s eyes welled up with tears and she brushed them away, disgusted with herself.
“Next we have understudies. The understudy for Odile will be Jessica. The understudy for Odette will be Sydney.” Elise looked up from her clipboard and smiled at Sydney.
“See? You’re an understudy!” Natalia poked Sydney. “You still have a chance to be Odette.”
Sydney groaned. Great. I have to go to extra practices for nothing, she thought to herself.
“Syd. I’m so sorry,” Michelle said in mock pity. Sydney brushed past her and walked out the door, seething.
* * *
The days turned into weeks and the weeks turned into months and the first show drew closer and closer. Sydney learned her swan part and the part of Odette. She even practiced the grand Pas de deux a few times with Michael, who played the Prince. Sydney loved Odette’s part and wished with all her heart it was truly hers. I should’ve been Odette, she’d say to herself.
* * *
OK! Michelle! Let’s do the
part that starts with ba bum bum bum.” Elise mimicked the music, making Natalia, sitting in the audience, stifle a laugh behind her hand. Sydney caught Natalia’s eye from where she was standing in the right wings. Natalia flashed her a thumbs-up as the music started and Sydney ran out on the stage, fluttering her fingers to look like feathers.
It was dress rehearsal, the day before the first show. Sydney was prepared for both roles, a swan and Odette. She never stopped hoping she would get a chance to be Odette.
“That’s a wrap, everyone! Good job, now go home and get some sleep! See you tomorrow!” Elise said.
That night, Sydney couldn’t sleep. She was so excited, yet disappointed at the same time. I should’ve been Odette, she thought bitterly.
* * *
The next day was warm with a cool breeze, a mild day for mid-June. Sydney arrived at the theater at five o’clock, two hours before the show started. She stretched a little, then proceeded to put her costume on. Her costume was a white-and-silver tutu with silver feathers and a white headpiece. Sydney’s curly hair was pulled back in a bun.
“Syd!” Natalia squealed. “You look fabulous!” Natalia was wearing a black tutu with black tights and pointe shoes to match.
“So do you, Nat.” Sydney turned around and saw Leila who, as one of the party guests, was wearing a silky blue dress and a frilly lace petticoat. Her hair was done in brunette ringlets with a turquoise bow perched jauntily on top.
“Unfortunately for us, so does Michelle.” Natalia gestured over to the large mirror where Michelle stood, attaching glittery fake eyelashes to her eyelids. She was dressed in a tutu as white as snow, with sparkles glistening like snowflakes. Her silky white pointe shoes seemed to shine in the overly intense lightbulbs.
“Ten minutes until showtime, girls!” Elise chirped. “And boys,” she added, glancing at Michael.
“I’m getting nervous,” Natalia shivered, rocking from side to side.
“Relax. You’ll do great,” Leila reassured.
“What if I mess up?” Natalia said.
“You won’t.”
Sydney left her two friends and started to walk over to where Michelle stood. I should’ve been Odette.
“Hey, Michelle…”
Michelle turned around.
“What?” the raven-haired girl spat.
“…Break a leg.” Sydney smiled halfheartedly. She walked away, leaving Michelle with her mouth wide open.
The music started and Michelle ran out on stage, fluttering her arms and flashing a diamond smile. Sydney and the rest of the swans followed and they proceeded to do their opening dance. Sydney danced her heart out, but she knew it would be hard to notice a lowly swan in the back. I should’ve been Odette…
They were about halfway through the dance when it happened. It seemed like Sydney knew what was going to happen half a second before it did. Michelle started to do a single pirouette en pointe and she mounted wrong. Her ankle bent awkwardly, and she fell, the shimmering body of a swan, lying crumpled on the stage. The audience gasped and Sydney rushed forward, helping Michelle off the stage. She heard Elise’s voice, “We will have a brief intermission,” ring through the theater.
“Are you OK?” Sydney whispered, even though she already knew the answer. Michelle nodded, breathing heavily. She tried to stand up, but moaned in pain and bent over Sydney’s arms.
“I’m fine,” she whispered hoarsely. “I’ve worked so hard to be Odette! I have to keep going.”
Sydney blinked. Michelle also wanted to be Odette. I wasn’t the only one… I should’ve known. Michelle’s just a person… just like me. She looked down and saw that Michelle was crying, her mascara running down her cheeks.
“Michelle?” Sydney asked tentatively. The dark-haired girl looked up. “I’m so sorry… for everything. I was so jealous and I thought… I was so sure that…” Sydney looked at Michelle and saw that she’d already been forgiven.
“I can’t believe you’re apologizing to me.” Michelle wiped a tear that had almost reached her chin. “After how rude I was to you, I never thought you would help me like you just did. I’m really sorry, Sydney. I was jealous of you, too. I mean, you’re always so confident about everything. And then there’s me… always second best.”
“What?” Sydney giggled. “I always thought you were the best dancer here!”
“Really?” Michelle laughed, too.
“Oh, Michelle!” Elise rushed over, a doctor following. “Are you OK? What hurts? Your ankle?” Michelle nodded.
“Well, let me take a look at it,” the doctor said, lifting up Michelle’s foot. “Could you take off your pointe shoe?”
“Sure,” Michelle whispered.
While the doctor was examining Michelle’s ankle, Elise turned to Sydney. “You have to be Odette,” she told her.
“What? Me?” Sydney squeaked. “But… but…”
“Sydney, you have to! You’re the understudy, you know the part.”
Sydney closed her eyes. I should’ve been Odette. How many times had she thought that? Now she was going to be Odette. I should be thrilled, she thought. But why does it feel so wrong? “I don’t have a choice, do I,” she said, more to herself than to Elise.
Elise put a comforting hand on Sydney’s shoulder. “You’ll do great. You know we do ten shows. Maybe Michelle can be in some of them.”
Sydney took a deep breath. “OK.”
Ten minutes later, Sydney stood backstage in Michelle’s Odette costume. She only vaguely heard Elise announce, “Thank you for your cooperation. We will now resume the show.” She only vaguely heard the audience applaud. She only vaguely heard the music begin to play. All she could hear was her own voice. I should’ve been Odette. “No,” she whispered, “Michelle deserved it as much as I did.” Sydney smiled and ran onstage, fluttering her fingers.
* * *
The applause was thunderous. It seemed like every person in the audience was standing, giving Sydney and the rest of the dancers a standing ovation. “It’s over,” Natalia whispered to Sydney as they stood backstage, waiting for their turn to go onstage for a bow.
“The first one, at least,” Sydney smiled at her. “Now, go!” she prodded Natalia in the side.
Natalia ran onstage and curtsied gracefully. People clapped louder than ever and there were even a few playful boys that booed.
Sydney took a deep breath and ran onstage. The applause for her was the loudest, she noticed. She took center stage and waited for Elise to come onstage like she always did.
Elise walked onto the stage and with her was… Michelle. Her ankle was wrapped up, but other than that, she was walking fine. Michelle smiled almost shyly and curtsied. She backed up so she was standing next to Sydney. “You were great,” Michelle whispered.
“Thanks,” Sydney said. “I’m sure you’ll be even better.”
“Friends?” Michelle asked timidly.
“Friends,” Sydney grinned, and the two girls hugged as the curtain closed.



I love the pictures
Comment by rose on December 4, 2010.
What a beautiful piece! I can tell the author has a vast knowledge of ballet and may even be a ballerina herself! The descriptions were divine, especially of the costumes. Great job!
Comment by Madeleine on December 9, 2010.
THAT WAS AWESOME! I really liked the story
Comment by Adine on December 10, 2010.
Hey, your story is GREAT! I LOVE it! I can tell that if you wanted to publish it for the world, I bet you could!
Keep writing!
Comment by AnneMarie on December 10, 2010.
I love this story! It is so cool and it is written realy well!!!
Comment by Nora Campbell on December 14, 2010.
So good! i love it! It almost makes me want to be a dancer!
Comment by Clara on December 15, 2010.
The story was great!I am going to share your story with my friend.If you wrote another story I would sure read it!
Comment by Lily Ann on December 21, 2010.
Hello Alison – I think your story was really really good. Thanks, Layla, 8 years old.
Comment by Layla Cole on December 25, 2010.
that is a nice story. You did okay work, but showed a lesson. You need to make a clear problem and add tention. Good waste of time anyway. I’m still glad that you tried.
Comment by eva on December 31, 2010.
I love this story! It is a really nice idea, and I love ballet!
Comment by Gillian on January 7, 2011.
Love your story! Gives me inspiration for the school talent show-(made it into the finals!!!)
Comment by Ginger on January 15, 2011.
Out standing I like how the situation turns out to be
Comment by jane on January 17, 2011.
I really liked this story. I thought it was a good plot and good conflict. I thought it was really good how the thoughts that seemed so rgiht before (I should be Odette) became so wrong and inaccurate when she looked into Michelle’s eyes and realized how selfish she had been. Good story. I enjoyed reading it
Comment by Daisy on January 18, 2011.
I love this story alot.
Comment by Sweha on January 27, 2011.
It’s Swetha, not sweha.
Comment by Swetha on January 27, 2011.
‘.- I am very thankful to this topic because it really gives up to date information ,:;
Comment by Storage Equipment on January 28, 2011.
It relates to reality!
And.. more.
Comment by Margaret on January 29, 2011.
That was a very good story. Great ending, pretty interesting too. I hope to see more stories from this writer Because this one was phenomenal.
Comment by Anonymous on February 3, 2011.
the story was okay
Comment by isek on February 12, 2011.
Amazing. I really, love to dance!
Comment by Lauren on February 20, 2011.
have you seen black swan ??? it reminds me of this story on ly less scary.
Comment by jane on February 28, 2011.
What a beautiful story. Great emotions!
Comment by Blank on March 15, 2011.
This extremely well written! You should extend the story and publish a book!!! I can’t wait until my novels sound like yours!!! Awesome job!!!
Comment by Mary Jane on March 17, 2011.
See my writing blog: writingsfromajuniornovelist.blogspot.com
Comment by Mary Jane on March 17, 2011.
I love this story! Great job Alison! I like the painting, too.
Comment by Emma on March 20, 2011.
that was written well
Comment by grace on March 22, 2011.
This story is incredible!
Comment by Me on March 29, 2011.
A great story, keep up the good work Alison.
Comment by Anonymous on March 29, 2011.
The story is great! you’re a great writer!
Comment by Matildaforever on April 3, 2011.
THIS SUCKED!
Comment by Squirell on April 4, 2011.
This is an amazing piece of work
Comment by Sadia on April 4, 2011.
It was extremely realistic, which I liked. The author had a few plot twists which were unexpected, but I wasn’t surprised that Sydney ended up playing the part, nor was I surprised by the fact that Michelle twisted her ankle (I anticipated it when she first said the words “Break a leg”). I would enjoy seeing a few more pieces from this author, but the author might want to brush up on description.
There was one part that was somewhat odd:
I should’ve been Odette. “No,” she whispered, “Michelle deserved it as much as I did.” Sydney smiled and ran onstage, fluttering her fingers.
It seems odd that Sydney would smile as she ran onstage if she thought Michelle deserved the part. I understand that it’s possible she was mainly doing it as an act, but I believe that a young girl who has been asked to take place of somebody else who she’s the understudy of would have a different reaction. This is the same for when Michelle twisted her ankle. I think Syd would’ve reacted much more obviously, not just stared and said a few words.
Overall, the story wasn’t too bad, but it could be improved. All the best to the writer.
Comment by Unknown on April 5, 2011.
he story was okay
Comment by Ausin on April 5, 2011.
awesome book haha
Comment by loabhd on April 5, 2011.
I LOVE THIS STORY SO MUCH
Comment by Hannah Huffman on April 5, 2011.
that was a very awesome story good job
Comment by ariel paige staley on April 5, 2011.
This story was AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I absolutely loved it!!! Great job Alison!!!
Comment by Mary on April 7, 2011.
This is such a good story!
Comment by Leah on April 12, 2011.
wow loved it very creative!!!!!!!!!
Comment by Galen on April 16, 2011.
Amazingly beautiful! The end was lovely and thrilled me to pieces <3
Comment by Becca on April 19, 2011.
That was so awesome,the ending almost made me cry!
Comment by Raven on April 23, 2011.
I love this story! A great retelling of a classic fairytale. I love your names and the touches of fantasy to the descriptions of the ballet moves. Overall, a fantastic story!
From,
Amy in Shanghai, China.
Comment by Amy on April 25, 2011.
I really liked it!!! As a dancer myself, I give you two thumbs and a tor chite’!
(I really don’t know how to spell that.))
Comment by Emmie on April 25, 2011.
it was very good and you really should keep writing, and maybe you’ll publish some books in the future.
Comment by young writer girl on April 27, 2011.
interesting, but creative!!
Comment by faller on May 6, 2011.
I was supposed to do homework on this website but this is one of the best story’s I have ever read! Love it!
Comment by Elizabeth on May 6, 2011.
Love it
Comment by ChengMing on May 13, 2011.
Wow lulu is an amazing writer . As a dancer I felt her story really captured the feeling of when a dancer is on stage
Comment by Amanda on May 16, 2011.
This is such a great piece. I felt like I was there!
Comment by Frogs2Marz on May 25, 2011.
Amazing. A lovely story. I bet you are a good ballerina, or at least an amazing researcher- to find out about the moves and stuff. I did ballet for like, four years and I fell over LOADS!
Brilliant story.
Comment by Lily Rose on May 31, 2011.
OMG!Your story is amazing! You are a really good writer! So cool!!! I give you 5 stars!
Comment by Emma on June 3, 2011.
Beautiful writing!!! Sounds realistic and I was on the edge of my seat. GREAT CHOICE OF WORDS!!!
Comment by pigsrock2202 on June 3, 2011.
Comment by pigsrock2202 on June 3, 2011.
Comment by pigsrock2202 on June 3, 2011.
LOVED IT!!!!
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Comment by pigsrock2202 on June 3, 2011.
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Comment by pigsrock2202 on June 3, 2011.
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Comment by pigsrock2202 on June 3, 2011.
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Comment by pigsrock2202 on June 3, 2011.
This was really well written, but I thought the plot was somewhat weak. It was pretty clear that Sydney would end up playing the part she wanted. Also, Michelle and Sydney ending up friends just isn’t realistic, I’d like to read some of your other work!!! (:
Comment by Sky on June 6, 2011.
i lo-oove this story!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Comment by ainsley on June 8, 2011.
I love this story! Alison Buick is a really talented author. I agree with Sky –the only thing is that the plot wasn’t very strong, and that you knew Sydney would get the part. But it’s great for a simple, short story!
Comment by Rue on June 8, 2011.
I can’t believe this was accepted. There is no plot, It’s ridiculously boring, there are too many useless characters, and the story is shallow. It was obvious from the beginning what would happen and there was no point in reading. The picture was unrealistic and made the people look like badly made dolls.
Comment by Elaine on June 14, 2011.
i think it is a fabulous story if compared with its length…
nice work
Comment by shafe on June 15, 2011.
Wow! I loved the descriptions, and I dance, so I know that either you must be a knowledgeable dancer, or have done a lot of research, which always improves the depth of a story. Overall, I thought the story was very well ritten. I also like the foreshadowing when Sydney said “I should be Odette”, and it backfired on her. It really represents a good moral. Nice job!
Comment by Madison on June 19, 2011.
Totally amazing. I would love to see you dance. The lesson was something everyone could relate to: Disappointment. We all have to be disappointed once in our lives, but if you just do your bets you might not be as disappointed as you could be. Working hard is another lesson that was learned in this story.
Comment by Juniper on June 30, 2011.
(: (;
Comment by Juniper on June 30, 2011.
You’re a very good writer, Alison. You have a good ear for dialogue, and know how to keep the story going. But you also give enough information to create a very good picture of time and place.
The ending was superb. I was wondering whether Syd would get to play Odette and triumph, or she wouldn’t and still feel okay. That’s what I was expecting. But you gave this an awesome twist, and showed how Michelle wasn’t just really “the bad guy” (or girl).
Great job! I hope you keep writing for a long time!
jessiethought
Comment by jessiethought on July 3, 2011.
That was amazing, it doesn’t even seem like your a kid! I have tried so hard to write a detailed story, but it takes a lot.
Comment by Cassidy on July 14, 2011.
Wow! This story is genuinely AMAZING! I loved it!
Comment by Eve on July 19, 2011.
I liked the story a lot! I’ve danced almost all my life and in this book, how you described the different steps and what it felt like on stage, was exactly how it really is. So either you’re a dancer or you’ve REALLY done your research. Good job:)
Comment by Livvy on July 26, 2011.
It was sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo good! Lots of detail. Just like most stories, a happy ending.Plus the right use of words!:o)
Comment by Undiscovered101 on August 3, 2011.
I loved the story so much! It was so terrific! I also have a friend named Leila but her last name isn’t Mason! I also loved the picture! Bye!!!
Comment by Amelia on August 3, 2011.
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Comment by kevin chiles on August 10, 2011.
so good
Comment by Olive on August 19, 2011.
Cool story!
Really think you are up to ballet and audition kind of stuff, right?
What is the audition for? A ballet show? If it is, what is it? What is the name of the ballet show?
And let’s be good friends, Allison… My name is YEalim Jang. I read your story aimlessly, and I couldn’t even stop reading!
Let me tell you my email address… : yealimjang@gmail.com.
I guess now everyone uses gmail!
Have a great day… And don’t forget to email me, Allison!!!
Cheers, Yealim Elsie Rachelyn Jang
Comment by Yealim Jang on August 22, 2011.
i hate the story its horible
Comment by pigsrock2202 on August 31, 2011.
hhahahhahahahahy what a boring story hahahahahha what a bunch of idiots hahahahahaahaha well bye
Comment by pigsrock2202 on August 31, 2011.
i hate this its so gay like u u suk big one
Comment by juniper on August 31, 2011.
Oh oh oh, great story.
Comment by Cindy on September 7, 2011.
It started out great but then it spiraled into a very predictable ending.
Comment by runningwithscissors on September 11, 2011.
I agree with Elaine. This is useless.
Comment by Radar on September 11, 2011.
i like your story did it really happen
Comment by yesenia on September 16, 2011.
Comment by jimmybob1 on September 18, 2011.
Comment by jimmybob1 on September 18, 2011.
OMG (Oh my Gosh) That was amazing. THis girl is so talented! She should be published!
Comment by Brianna on September 20, 2011.
Good job Alison. I liked this story–I’ve heard of one quite similar, but I liked yours better. In comparison with your age, it’s great! Keep up the good writing!
Comment by Mary on September 22, 2011.
Wow that was really good! You’re a great writer
Have you wrote another? Because i want to read it!
Comment by Chloe on September 27, 2011.
OK, I’m actually surprised this got in. And surprised at the, in my opinion, praise it got.
Firstly, the plot was shallow, cliched, and overall boring. Also, predictable. You spent more time describing their outfits for the show then the CHARACTERS. The characters have no set personality, have no depth, and are overall dull. Your description is lacking in all the right places.
I felt no EMOTION during this piece, which is crucial. I did not HATE the character who got Odette, I did not pity Sydney. Really, I was thinking more of the lines of “…Wow. Spoiled.” Or something like that. I think you could’ve developed them better, or make them more understandable, in that I-cry-for-them way, if you know what I’m saying.
Your OK-ish, but you still need to brush up. A lot.
Good luck.
-Vee
Comment by Vee on September 27, 2011.
What a wonderful story! It’s much more interesting than many stories I’ve recently read, and they were written by people much older than you. I love that you incorporated your knowledge of ballet and you clearly have a firm grasp on how plot and dialogue work. Please continue to write! You are very talented.
Comment by M on October 2, 2011.
Okay: unknown on comment 32 when you said,There was one part that was somewhat odd:
I should’ve been Odette. “No,” she whispered, “Michelle deserved it as much as I did.” Sydney smiled and ran onstage, fluttering her fingers.
It seems odd that Sydney would smile as she ran onstage if she thought Michelle deserved the part.
well, i’m a ballerina and all ballerinas smile onstage unless they want to get yelled at by their teachers. and anyone who said this sucked, it’s a brilliant story about finding your true friends and loving what you do.
Comment by Arline on October 3, 2011.
WOW inspiring!
Comment by Mari on October 3, 2011.
I have to admit that was one of the best ballerina stories i have ver heard!! i love it!!
Comment by Steph on October 4, 2011.
i loved it! i am a ballerina myself. it is a fantastic story! you are a fantastic writer.
Comment by tanner grant on October 6, 2011.
you did great i like to write storues like that but i also write adventure stories
Comment by Eileen on October 11, 2011.
WOW! This story is fantabulous! You are truly a awe-inspiring author. Keep it up. I love it! LOL! PICKLE!
:):):):):):):):)
Comment by Steph on October 23, 2011.
This is a sweet story, but pretty predictable, but that is ok. Sometimes writers want their readers to pretty much know how it ends =) =)
Comment by Hayley D. on October 23, 2011.
i just loved it!!!
Comment by Kit on November 18, 2011.
Great job Alison I LOVED your book and found it very inspiring.I get stone soup every once and awhile and read the ones my friends have. I have read a lot of them and this story is one of the best I have read so far. This story is amazing and if you don’t have talent i don’t know who does
keep up the good work
-Nature Girl
Comment by Nature Girl on November 26, 2011.
I really want to be an author. Your story really inspired me. I just auditioned for writing at D.S.A. and I’m not sure if you live in Colorado or Denver or even the U.S.A.! I hope that I can write like you someday!
Comment by Edie on December 3, 2011.
this an awesome story!! I love ballet too!
Comment by Eve on December 8, 2011.
neat-o thats a really great story!
Comment by kara on December 14, 2011.
This story is really really good. I hope I could wright like that.
Comment by Mariana R on December 15, 2011.
I thought that this story was absolutely amazing! You really explained how the girl felt and that’s exactly how one would feel in that situation. I love the picture too! You should sent it into a contest or something.
Comment by Cat M. on December 15, 2011.
This is a great story. How long did it take you to write this?
Comment by Cam B on December 15, 2011.
This is great writing! Keep up the good work.
Comment by Audrey M. on December 15, 2011.
This was a great story! I love how life like the dialogue is! Like I said, great story, but I think that you may want to spend a bit more time developing the characters. Keep writing!
Comment by Olivia on December 15, 2011.
I love your description and explanation of the characters thoughts throughout the story. However, watching her evolve was what made this story magnificent instead of good.
Comment by Miriam Hyman on December 27, 2011.
I think that comment #62 is horrible. This is an extremely flabbergasting story. I couldn’t write that good though I plan to one day. You will be a a well known author when you grow up.
Comment by Edie on January 4, 2012.
I am extremely inspired along with your writing skills as smartly as with the layout on your blog. Is that this a paid topic or did you modify it yourself? Either way keep up the excellent quality writing, it’s uncommon to look a nice weblog like this one nowadays..
Comment by car or truck on January 10, 2012.
I loved this story. It was interesting and well written. This writer is extremely talented.
Comment by Angel Wings Rodreigez on January 13, 2012.
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Comment by Burberry kids on January 15, 2012.
it was a really great story line, and alison buick is obviously a future writer, but it was just the teensiest bit cheesy.
but at the same time it wasn’t, you know?
Comment by anna on January 16, 2012.
great job!
Comment by izzyfizzy99 on January 18, 2012.
Comment by izzyfizzy99 on January 18, 2012.
Hi! I’ve been following your weblog for a while now and finally got the bravery to go ahead and give you a shout out from Kingwood Texas! Just wanted to mention keep up the fantastic job!
Comment by Shermag Glider Rocker on January 19, 2012.
GREAT STORY!Ilove ballet as well.
Comment by Alexa on January 22, 2012.
Your use of symbolism (go break a leg) was good; most kids don’t even know what that is. It isn’t a great story- lacking in description, figurative language and the plot could have been stronger. I think if you worked at it, you could be a great writer. Mind you, this is constructive critiscism,and every writer needs to improve.
Comment by Ophie on January 29, 2012.
I LOVED this story. It was the best story I ever read. It was really wonderful!
Comment by ananya jain on February 21, 2012.